I honestly wasn't sure if it's a good idea to post this, I was afraid that it would ruin people's already bad mood about the current state of affairs. But I honestly feel like my and similar to mine experiences with Pride aren't heard at all, so I'm warning you, if you aren't doing well, don't read this post.

So, what do I feel about Pride Month?

A bit more, than nothing. As a Russian, I'd say that there was no widespread celebration of queer rights because Russia never had its Stonewall and practically because there's nothing to celebrate. In my lifetime, queer rights were getting only worse, leaving queer people with migrating as the only option to have chances for better life.

Queer people in Russia always have to hide. Many have severe trust issues, especially since there are police raids at the gay clubs, FSB pretending to be queers online, fake dates that often end up tragically. You have to have a good reputation and be known to other queer people to find organizations and events, these stay mostly in private telegram channels. Trans people have to completely lay down and stay silent about their identity, many can't even afford HRT that is now basically illegal, especially for those who take testosterone, an already very controlled drug. Transfems also need more legal help to deal with army drafts, since they can't change gender marker anymore. Gender-nonconforming people also can get snitched by others for propagating "untraditional values". I'd list every other aspect if I wasn't too tired, but basically what we get now is similar to how it was in the USSR.

From May 2023 to 14th of July 2023, Russian State Duma was preparing a transgenocide law. It forced me and my family to leave the country, since one of us was already on HRT. Our original plan was to get everyone HRT and gender affirming surgeries, then buy a house. We were very young to migrate anywhere else. Now we are in a country isolated from most people because none of us speaks it's language and we have to constantly change apartments, so practically we don't have a place we can truly call a home. We're not even immigrants, but legally tourists, guests that have little protection and have to do visa run. Shit sucks. People in their early 20s should have calm and stable lives, not all of this, in my opinion.

2023 was also last year I drew something for Pride. And it's the drawing you saw at the start of this post. If I draw my fursona happily holding a flag, like how it is with most Pride Month art, it would be a lie. And I hate lying. I don't feel empowered neither. This month, for me, is just a reminder that more work has to be done. Especially now.

I'm asking everyone else to be aware that Stonewall is not part of international queer history. Russia at this time still had the "no homo" law that was canceled only when USSR got dissolved and Russia was concerned about this law interrupting them from joining Council of Europe, so they had to cancel it. That was it, basically. They didn't give a shit about queer people and won't now. I'm tired of people talking about fights for queer rights in US as if it applies to every country. This is not my first time talking how it is in Russia and yet most of posts about Russia and especially other EECCA countries get drown out, so I'll continue bringing this up. I hope now you understand why I feel this way about Pride Month.